


Life with Lucas

by bellemelange



Category: Spooks
Genre: Angry Sex, F/M, Oral Sex, Romance, Sex, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-30
Updated: 2016-11-07
Packaged: 2018-04-07 00:33:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4242714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bellemelange/pseuds/bellemelange
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Life with Lucas" doesn't follow the story line in Spooks but bits and pieces has been used. And no, Lucas doesn't die nor does he turn out to be John Bateman.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Lucas was smiling as he called Tara. “Can I persuade you to cook me dinner tonight?”  
Tara smiled. “Of course you can. What time will you be here?”  
Lucas replied, “As soon as I can – should be around 7. I really need to talk to you.”  
“OK,” she said, “anything special you want for dinner? And do you want dessert?”  
She could hear Lucas smile. “Yes… mind cooking salmon? And can I have chocolate mousse for dessert?”  
Tara smiled, “Dinner at 7.”  
  
He hung up and his mind wandered back to the day the Russians handed him over to Harry – it was the same day he met her the first time.  
She was talking to Adam when he came out of the men’s room after being cleaned up. She was wearing black jeans, a white shirt and high heels. Apart from a pair of earrings, he noted she wore no other jewellery. Her long, brown hair was tied in a ponytail and she was smiling a lot. Adam introduced her, Tara. As Lucas said hello to her, he realised that her eyes were green. Despite the fact that Elizaveta was on his mind, Lucas found that she sparked something deep inside him. He wanted to get to know more about her. Tara had asked Lucas and Adam to come to her house for dinner the same night, and they had agreed.  
  
On their way to her house, Lucas had asked Adam about her and learned that she was Harry's "daughter". She was actually his niece but he had taken in when her parents were killed in a freak accident and Harry had raised her as his own child.  
As they walked towards the front door, Adam said, "She's under Malcolm's wings, Harry will never let her be a field agent. Early 30s, a happy soul and very sweet."  
  
After dinner, Adam had told Lucas that he had to leave, but that Lucas should stay. He had asked Adam if she wouldn’t find it strange that her boyfriend left, but not him. Adam had smirked and told Lucas that he was not her boyfriend. Just then Tara had returned. Adam said, “Goodnight” and left. Lucas had stayed behind. For some reason, he felt relaxed in her company; he could be himself. He realised that he and Tara had been chatting away for hours. Lucas had mentioned to Tara that he suffered from insomnia at times, and she had told him that if he couldn’t sleep or if he needed someone to talk to, he could come to her place.  
  
In the next few weeks, Lucas had taken advantage of her offer quite a few times. Tara was easy to talk to and for some reason, he could always sleep when he was at her house. She had even given him a key and the guest room was his to use as he saw fit.  
  
Tara had gotten him through the weeks of debriefing; she had always been there when he needed to get things off his chest. She had known from the start that he had PTSD and never once had he seen her back away. She had been there every step of the way with him.  
  
At one point, Lucas had asked Tara about the house. Tara had told him that it was bought from the money she inherited when her parents died. Tara’s mother was Harry’s sister and, as Lucas already knew, Harry had taken her in after the accident. Learning that she had moved with Harry after his divorce, Lucas realised why Harry seemed so very protective of her and Adam’s “Harry will run a complete security check on anyone before letting them getting near her” made sense. Adam’s remark had fallen one day, Lucas had been looking a little too long at her. Lucas also realised that day that he was attracted to Tara; she made him happy. Adam, who had appeared to read Lucas’ mind, had grinned and wished him good luck getting past Harry and Malcolm.  
  
When Lucas arrived, Tara was almost done with dinner. She could hear him drop his bag in the hallway. He entered the kitchen, put the bottle of wine on the table, gave Tara a hug, as he always did when he arrived, and pulled out flowers from behind his back. He placed a gentle kiss on her cheek and noticed that she smelled of white flowers.  
  
Tara looked at him with surprise. “What was that for?”  
He grinned. “I thought it was about time I brought you flowers for all the times you’ve cooked for me.”  
“What?” Tara looked confused. “Oh, it was always my pleasure.”  
She got a grip on herself and asked Lucas to set the table while admitting to herself that she wanted him badly.  
Their eyes locked as they sat down and Tara wondered if Lucas knew how she felt. Then again, she thought, it didn’t matter; he had Elizaveta.  
  
During dinner, Tara looked at Lucas. “So, what have you been up to this week?”  
Lucas smiled. “Do you want to hear all of it?”  
  
Tara nodded. “Of course! Being on holiday means no information about what is happening at the Grid and Harry doesn’t say much and I haven’t heard from Malcolm either.”  
“Well,” Lucas smiled, “first I kissed Ros.”  
“Oh…” Tara took a sip of her wine, hoping her expression didn’t show her feelings. “I didn’t know you two were romantically involved. I thought she and Adam were at it.”  
“We’re not. I was her fiancé to get information to her while she was undercover.”  
Tara nodded, relieved. “And then?”  
“Then I met up with Elizaveta Starkova and to quote her, she said, ‘Don’t use me, Lucas, unless you know you can give me everything’.” Lucas paused and then continued, “I realised that it wasn’t a question of what I could give her or not. I realised that I didn’t want to. I will always have the memories, but it just stopped there. When she called the next day, I didn’t answer and I told Personnel that she was no longer to be used as an asset.”  
Tara reached out and her hand rested on Lucas’ arm. “Are you alright?”  
“Yes, I am,” Lucas sent Tara a smile.  
“I take it you have been able to sleep since there have been no late night visits and the bed has been unused.”  
“No, actually there were a couple of nights when I have been awake.”  
“You should have come here.” Tara removed her hand from his arm and sat up straight.  
Lucas shook his head. “No… I had too much to sort out.”  
Tara rose from the table and began clearing it. “I am not sure I understand.”  
Lucas rose, too, and helped clear the table. “You don’t?”  
“No,” Tara smiled, “I understand the sorting out part, but normally you come here to do that.” She looked at him. “I meant her; I don’t understand how you could let Elizaveta go just like that. I always thought you hoped things could be fixed.”  
Lucas nodded and ran a hand through his black hair. “I think I did hope that in the beginning, but that was before I realised that I no longer loved her. To be honest, Tara, I think what I missed was the person I was then – before Russia. Maybe I was hoping that I could be that person again. At the end of the day, I just realised that it wasn’t her that I was in love with.”  
Tara did not say anything; she just took the wine glasses and the bottle of wine and pointed toward the living room.  
She and Lucas sat down on the sofa, cuddled up in each end of the sofa, and Tara looked at him. “I didn’t know you before Russia, but the Lucas I know is a good man.”  
  
Lucas smiled and reached for his wine. “Is it okay if I stay here tonight?”  
Tara rolled her eyes. “Of course it is!”  
He smiled, “Can I have a long warm bath, too?”  
Tara smiled. “Stop asking my permission! You know that when you are here, you do not have to ask my permission for anything. If there’s something you want to do, just do it.”  
“Anything?” There was a cheeky grin on his face.  
“Yes,” Tara smiled, “Anything.”  
He smirked. “You just might be sorry you said that.” He winked at her and Tara smilingly shook her head. Something was different about him. Tara couldn’t put her finger on what it was, but she did like the new Lucas very much.  
Lucas went off to have his bath and Tara turned on the TV.  
After some time, she heard Lucas call for her from the bathroom. She knocked on the bathroom door. “Are you okay in there?”  
“Just come on in,” Lucas replied, “I need your help.”  
Tara opened the door a little. “Are you decent?”  
Lucas grinned. “I’m sure you have seen a naked man before!”  
“I have,” Tara admitted with a laugh, “but surely you didn’t get me in here to ask that?”  
“No,” Lucas was sitting in the tub, “but I need a towel… I forgot to get one earlier.”  
  
She opened a cabinet and got a towel for him. She unfolded it and held it towards him, “I’m sure you can take it from here?”  
“So you don’t want to rub me dry?”  
Tara couldn’t help laughing as she turned and left the bathroom.  
  
A couple of hours and a bottle of wine later, Tara decided that it was bedtime. She turned her phone off; that thing was not going to wake her in the morning. She could sleep in and so could he.  
The guest room was just across the hall from hers. Tara looked at him. “Goodnight, Lucas. If you need anything, just wake me up – it’s okay, really.”  
He nodded. “Goodnight.”  
Tara left her bedroom door ajar as she always did, got undressed, and crawled underneath the duvet, completely naked.  
From across the hall, she could hear Lucas settling in, too.  
Half an hour later, Tara was still awake and she could hear Lucas was, too. She sat up and turned on the light.  
Gently she called, “Lucas, are you alright? You’ve been tossing and turning.”  
She could hear him walk across the room and into the hallway. He opened her bedroom door.  
“I can’t sleep.”  
  
Tara watched him as he took a deep breath and came over to the empty side of her bed and slid under the duvet. Tara looked at him, completely gobsmacked; he had never been in her bed before.  
“Ah, that’s much better,” Lucas said with a content look on his face, “and if you’ll be so kind and turn the light off again, we might even be able to sleep eventually.”  
Tara turned the light off and lay down. There was some commotion under the duvet. Tara turned her head and looked at him.  
“What are you doing? Could you at least lie still?”  
“I am only doing what I should have done a long time ago and no, I can’t lie still – not just yet! Spoon?”  
“Spoon?” Now she was confused. “You want to spoon?”  
“Yes.”  
She moved a little and felt him embrace her. Tara realised that they were both naked.  
“Comfy?” he asked and Tara nodded in silence.  
“I’m sorry I wasted so much time,” he mumbled.  
Tara caressed his arm, “You didn’t; think of all the hours we have spent together. They are not wasted.”  
Suddenly “Bloody hell!” exclaimed Lucas. Tara did not need to ask what the problem was. She could feel his erection against her arse. Gently she turned in his arms.  
“You are not going to get any sleep… “  
He sent her a smile. “I was hoping you would say that.”  
Tara sat up, and let her fingers trail down his stomach. “I believe you need a hand.”  
The next thing she knew, she was on her back and Lucas was kissing her. She reached down, and as her hand made contact with his cock, Lucas broke the kiss.  
“Tara, no – don’t touch! I haven’t done this is in a long time and I have no idea how long I can last – it’s hard enough to kiss you without coming.” He took her hands and locked them over her head, “There..”  
“If I’m not allowed to touch you, you will have to tell me what you want.”  
Lucas kissed her again. Their tongues were duelling, and without losing contact with her mouth, he placed himself between her legs. Gently he pushed himself into her; they fit perfectly. Lucas did his best to think about “Queen and country” but it was no good; his own need took over. He was pounding into her, craving his release.  
Tara let out a gasp as she felt the sensation building and her inner muscles clasped his cock.  
Her orgasm overtook her as did his, and Lucas collapsed on top of her; they were gasping for air. Finally, her breathing became normal, and Lucas rolled over on his back. Tara leaned over and kissed him.  
“I want another go in the morning.”  
  
He just smiled and pulled her down to him. Within minutes, they were both sleeping.  
  
When Tara woke, she was still in Lucas’ arms. As carefully as she could, she moved a little, only prompting Lucas to tighten his embrace. “Where do you think you are going?”  
Tara sighed happily, “Good morning, you! I just thought I would go make some coffee and some …”  
She was interrupted by the doorbell, sighed when the ringing continued and got out of bed. She found her dressing gown, put it on and went to open the door. It was Harry. He sent her a rather strange look.  
“Good morning, Tara. Sleeping in, are you? I just thought I would stop by to see how you were doing and I tried calling you but you didn’t answer.”  
Tara gave Harry a hug and stepped aside, “Come on in. I shut the phone off last night. Daddy, you have to stop worrying, I’m not a little girl anymore.” She closed the door behind Harry, “Do you want some coffee? I was just about to make some.”  
Without waiting for his reply, she went to the kitchen and put the water on, then went to the bathroom and brushed her teeth, gave Lucas a proper good morning kiss and put on sweat pants and a sweatshirt, while informing him Harry was there.  
She went back to the kitchen and began making omelettes.  
  
Lucas appeared, wearing a pair of sweatpants and a black tank top, “Good morning, Harry.”  
“Good morning, Lucas.” Harry sent Tara a questioning look and then looked at Lucas but he didn’t say anything.  
Tara came to the table with two mugs of coffee, “Here, you two.”  
Lucas’ one hand slid to Tara’s back, as he softly said, “Thank you.” Tara just smiled and went back to the omelettes.  
Harry looked from Tara to Lucas, “So is my niece treating you alright? She can be a bit of a handful, you know.” If he had any idea of what had happened between them, he managed to keep a straight face.  
Tara had finished making the omelettes and sat down the plates on the table. “Dig in!”  
Lucas winked at Tara, “I’m not complaining, Harry, not at all.”  
Tara looked at the box, “What’s that?”  
Harry smiled, “Ah, you and your curiosity.” Harry glanced at Tara, “It’s just some papers from Malcolm and a few things, I need Lucas to look at.”  
Harry turned to Lucas, “I was going to go to your flat after checking in on Tara, but since you are here…”  
He handed Lucas a stack of papers.  
Tara sent Harry a suspicious look, “Papers? So much for ‘you can take some time off’.”  
“Yes, I know… but Malcolm needs your help with this,” Harry replied. Tara noticed that he actually looked sorry.  
She shook her head, “Okay, I cannot disappoint sweet uncle Malcolm.”  
Tara looked at Lucas, who was eating his omelette. She took a fork and took some it from his plate, “And you just happened to know Lucas was here, did you?”  
“No,” Harry shook his head, “But since I hadn’t heard from him and I couldn’t get hold of him, I assumed that he could be here. I am aware of your agreement, you know.”  
The doorbell rang again.  
Tara rolled her eyes as she got up, “Bloody hell! What is going on here?”  
Lucas and Harry could hear the door and when Tara appeared, Ben was behind her.  
Ben sat down at the table and Tara got him some coffee. “Can I expect the rest of the Grid to show up, too?”  
Ben grinned and shook his head. “I’m here to hear if you wanted to go train with me.”  
She sat down next to Lucas and his one hand was caressing her neck for a while, only to slide down her back and rest there. He pushed the plate with an omelette to her. Tara began eating.  
Ben grinned at Lucas, “That took you some time, Lucas!”  
Before Lucas could reply, Harry said, while looking straight at Tara, “Just what is going on? Have you two…”  
Tara calmly replied, “That is none of your business, Daddy. I am, as I said earlier too, not a little girl anymore.”  
Harry looked at her, “You are my niece, goddaughter and practically my child!”  
Ben winked at Lucas, “Here we go!” Lucas did not know, but Ben had witnessed Harry and Tara’s tempers collide several times before.  
Tara swallowed her food, “Yes, that I am. And on top of everything else, you are my boss, too.” Tara stared at him, “You cannot pull that card every time I disagree with you.”  
“Tara!” There was a warning in Harry’s voice.  
“No!” Tara shook her head, “There is nothing you can do about this, I won’t let you.”  
She was pointing at Harry with her fork while talking, “And don’t even think about trying.”  
Lucas decided to take it from her, “Give me that before you hurt someone!” Tara looked at him with a surprised look on her face and tried to reach for the fork, but he kept it out of her reach.  
Lucas turned to Harry, “Look, I know that we are going to need a clearance from you. I’m not going to say I’m sorry, I would be lying if I said that. Harry, she makes me feel whole.”  
Tara reached for the fork once more, “Can I have the fork, please – I wasn’t finished!”  
Lucas gave it to her, “Just don’t point it at anyone or poke them”, he said with a grin.  
Harry nodded at Lucas’ words. Then he sighed and asked Tara, “And if I say that I don’t want you in the same office if you are an item?”  
Tara took a sip of her coffee and calmly looked at Harry. “If that is a problem for you, then I will resign or ask to be transferred.”  
Ben began to laugh, “Tara! That is blackmail!”  
“No, Ben,” Tara replied calmly, “It’s not blackmail, it’s a fact. And besides, it’s easier to replace me than Lucas.”  
Ben turned to Lucas, “You will see this from time to time; they are like father and daughter. It can get rather loud when they don’t see things eye to eye.”  
Lucas smirked, “I’m sure it can.” He had no doubt Tara was as stubborn as Harry.  
Harry wasn’t about to let her off the hook, “You would do that, just like that?”  
“If it was a problem, yes. I understand you are not too keen on the idea because he’s an agent,” she replied and looked at Harry, as he interrupted her. “I am just trying to look after you!”  
Tara shook her head, “I know. You always have.” She looked down for a moment, “Daddy, I want this. I want Lucas and if that means resigning, I will. There’s no point in getting grumpy – you were the one who brought it up!”  
Harry nodded. “I know. I know how worried you will be every time Lucas is in the field. God knows that you have been driving me bonkers as it was and that was before...” he motioned toward her and Lucas.  
Lucas looked at Tara. “You were worried?”  
Tara shrugged. “Don’t get any fancy ideas, you.” She couldn’t help smiling at the look on his face and he took her by surprise when he kissed her, “I promise I will be careful.”  
“You better be…” Tara replied and returned his kiss.  
“Oh please!” Harry sat his mug down on the table and Tara looked at him. “What?”  
Ben laughed, “Don’t tell them to get a room, Harry! I think they have already been there and done that!”  
Tara rolled her eyes and finished her own coffee. “I’ll go take a shower.”  
  
As Tara came out of the shower, Lucas entered the bathroom. He wrapped his arms around her, “Mmmm, I love how you smell.”  
She places little kisses along his jaw line while undoing his sweat pants, “If I remember correctly, you owe me a round 2, Mr North.”  
Lucas sent her a naughty grin, “Oh do I?” He pretended to be thinking, “Yes, I believe I do! I’ll just take a quick shower and I’ll be with you.”  
He got out of his clothes and entered the shower. Before pulling the shower curtain, he winked, “Just don’t start without me.”  
  
Tara was drying her hair when Lucas returned to the bedroom, slightly damp and smelling wonderful as he always did. She had noticed that he used Armani one day, while she was cleaning the guest bathroom.  
  
He stood behind her, removing her towel, “Now, Miss Miller, where were we?”  
She swallowed, "Hmmm..." His thumb silenced her; only to be replaced with his lips. Their tongues were tangling; their hands were touching every inch of the other’s body. Finally, she pulled back, gasping for air. Her head was spinning, her body on fire – and she wanted him so badly. Low moans slipped from her.  
Lucas growled, “I want to be inside of you.”  
He dipped his head to nip at her neck with slow, light, teasing bites. Then his tongue began to lazily circle the edge of her ear as he spoke, "I want to make love to you. It will be slow... So very slow..." He traced a line of kisses and licks across her collarbone, murmuring, "So slow, that you will be begging me to go faster, to make you come..." Now his tongue trailed up her throat as he finished the sentence, "and if you beg well enough... perhaps I'll let you come... eventually..." Then his tongue was licking gently at her lips and she moaned softly as she took it into her mouth. As they broke from another soul-searing kiss, she looked at him.  
"Lucas," she moaned, her voice very shaky, "Oh, God..."  
He pressed his lips against hers in a soft, tender kiss. She immediately reached up to wind her arms around his neck, tilting her head slightly to return his kiss more firmly. She moaned again at the delightful tingling sensations that moved up her spine. She began to feel a rush of heat between her legs that he seemed able to cause with just the slightest touch.  
As he broke the kiss and began to nibble at her neck, she sighed and tilted her head to give him greater access, her mind not thinking at all at the moment, merely feeling, experiencing.  
"Mmmm," he panted in her ear, nipping her earlobe in emphasis. She shivered at the sensation of his warm breath and even warmer lips trailing over her sensitive skin, and at the mere sound of his purring, deep voice...  
Now his hands were moving over her, briefly massaging her breasts before sliding down her torso and around to the back to grasp her buttocks firmly to pull her tighter against him. She could feel the solid evidence of his arousal pressed against her lower belly, and this only helped to increase her own mindless desire.  
Positively panting and whimpering with lust now, she could feel him lying down on the bed, taking her with him and then rolling her on her back. Lying partially on top of her, his hand slid down between her legs, rubbing her crotch. He gave a low growl of approval at feeling this and bent to claim her lips once again as she arched eagerly against his hand.  
She reached up with a hand that shook slightly and ran it slowly over the line of his jaw, whispering, "Lucas, please..."  
Their mouths met with a fierce passion. Their kisses grew more frantic, their hands more busy, their breathing more harsh and urgent. She was begging, panting, writhing and groaning beneath him as he made love to her in a slow, yet intense fashion that drove her over the edge not once but twice. She bit his shoulder in the extremity of her pleasure to avoid screaming out loud. He hissed in a sharp breath of combined pain and ecstasy as her reaction triggered his own climax. He shuddered violently and groaned against her neck as he released his passion inside her body.  
They remained entwined on the bed, exchanging long, deep kisses, their passion sated.  
  



	2. Chapter 2

Tara braced herself as she saw Lucas cross the courtyard; it was clear that he was very angry. It would take him a couple of minutes to reach the office and hopefully, he would have calmed down a bit by then.   
She knew she had broken every possible rule after taking his car that morning – and ended up in a car crash, being hit by what turned out to be a Russian agent and not calling the Grid for help. She was trained like any other agent, only she was not allowed in the field due to being Harry’s niece and basically step-daughter and Lucas’ fiancée. Thanks to training, she did not panic but managed to find the weapon that was in the car and fire a shot. She wasn’t sure anyone at the Grid would be impressed by her skills with a gun but at least she had managed to take him down – and he was still alive. 

She went to get coffee and returned to her desk just as Lucas arrived. She had called him to let him know what had happened and he was not a happy camper.   
“He is still furious,” Tara thought to herself and Lucas' voice boomed, “TARA!” 

“Good luck,” Dimitri mumbled under his breath and Tara sent him a reassuring look, “I’ll be fine – once he has stopped yelling.”   
Tariq grinned, “You will go momentarily deaf.” 

Tara watched as Lucas sat down at the edge of her desk. “Where’s Daddy?” 

“With Ruth.” His voice was cold and deep.   
Tara fiddled with her coffee mug and took a deep breath, “OK, Lucas, give it to me; you’re obviously dying to.”   
The sound of his hand slamming down on the table made her jump but it was nothing compared to the anger in his voice. She noticed that Tariq and Dimitri left the office quietly.   
“What the hell were you thinking?” She was about to reply but fell silent as he continued, “You exposed yourself to danger and broke every possible rule in the process.” She lowered her gaze and kept it fixed on her desk and mumbled, “Yeah, and wrecked your car too.”   
Tara took a sip of her coffee, “I didn’t have time to call for help. Your Russian friend wasn’t exactly inviting me out for coffee.” She slammed the mug down with a bang, “Want to talk about exposing yourself to danger? Let’s start with sodding off to fucking Russia in the middle of the night. Then we can continue with playing with bombs and god know what else! And I did NOT expose myself to danger, the poor idiot didn’t even realise what hit him. He thought he was attacking a helpless woman once he realised that it wasn’t you in the car.”   
For the better of 5 minutes Lucas was yelling at her and finally Tara had it. She got up, “I’m not listening to this.”   
She turned to walk away as Harry and Ruth arrived. “Tara,” Harry said. “Oh dear! Lucas …” She fell silent as Lucas grabbed her by the arm and took her to one of the conference rooms. He noticed she flinched slightly and he could feel something unusual on her arm.   
He closed the door and shut the blinds, “You do NOT walk away from me when I am talking to you.”   
She shrugged, “You weren’t talking, you were yelling. It is not the same thing.”   
“You just don’t get it, do you?”   
“Get what? I ruined your car and I took a proper beating when I was hit, but I am still here and I am in one piece.”   
He nodded toward her. “Take it off.”   
“Why?”   
“I want to see what he did to you.” Staring at her, he continued, “Take it off. I am not going to ask you again.”   
Tara looked at him with disbelief, “But why, Lucas?”   
Lucas came toward her, determination written all over his face, “Last chance or I will rip the fucking shirt off you.”   
Tara shook her head and in silence, she unbuttoned her shirt and dropped it on the table.   
She was painfully aware of the bruises and the bandage on her arm and the look on Lucas’ face made her uneasy.   
He came over to her, all anger gone. He picked up her shirt and helped her put it on.   
“I’m so sorry, baby. It shouldn’t have happened and I wasn’t angry with you.” 

Tara understood; his reaction was very similar to her own when he came back and had been in danger except she always ended up crying her eyes out.   
He embraced her, “Go home and rest.” He gave her a long, promising kiss, “I have a few things to do but I’ll be home as soon as I am done.”   
Tara nodded, “Yes, the doctor said I should try to rest a bit.” She buttoned her shirt and kissed Lucas, “Hurry home, you have to look after the patient.”   
He caressed her back, hands resting on her arse, pulling her close, “The doctor said it was OK?”   
She laughed, “Em, I didn’t exactly ask if it was OK to have sex, but he didn’t mention it, so I am assuming it’s fine! You are not banging my head, darling!”   
She glanced down, “How are you going to hide that?”   
He released her and went behind her, “Practice, Miss Miller, practice – and tight jeans!”   
She turned and kissed him lightly, “Get your arse home as soon as possible!”   
On her way through the door to Harry’s office, she heard Lucas ask Dimitri to come with him.   
Ruth was in the office with Harry and Tara couldn’t help smiling.   
“When are you two going to make it official? We all know!”   
Ruth blushed and Harry hugged her, “Are you OK, Tara?”   
She smiled, “Yes, I am, Daddy.” She sat down next to Ruth, “I just wanted to say that I am going home to rest a bit.”   
Harry nodded, “Yes, that is probably a good idea. Is Lucas taking you home?”   
“No, he had something he needed to do.”   
Ruth looked at Harry, “I will drive her and come back.”   
Harry mumbled something and Tara burst out in laughter, “I’ll go get my things.”   
She turned in the doorway, “Daddy?”   
Harry looked up, “Hm?”   
“I’m glad you two are …”   
A rare smile crossed Harry’s face as he interrupted her, “Shush, you!” 

Hours later Tara woke, every inch of her body was aching and there was no sign of Lucas.   
Tara called him. “Hey you, coming home soon?”   
“On my way. I thought I’d bring some Chinese takeaway home. Or do you want something else?”   
Tara smirked, “Oh I do but it has nothing to do with food!” Lucas laughed as he hung up and Tara turned the shower on. It was pure bliss letting the warm water soothe her sore body.   
She heard the front door go and Lucas appeared in the doorway while getting undressed. He got in the shower and Tara moved a little, so he had enough room.   
For a moment she stood taking in the sight of him, then slowly began kissing her way down from his jaw line to his cock. Her hand cupped his balls and gently massaged them while her tongue played on the head.   
The other hand began stroking him and she could feel him grow.   
She let her tongue play all the way down his cock and took it in her mouth, her tongue was now playing with the head, he was moaning and he grabbed her head with both hands, controlling the movements. He was thrusting slightly into her mouth.   
Tara released the muscles in her throat, allowing her to take more of him in.

Suddenly he said, "No more" with a husky voice. She ignored him and continued until he pulled her head away. "I said no more."   
She looked up at him, “Please let me do this…” she did not wait for an answer, but returned to her doings.   
She could feel his cock twitching, his hips shot forward as the grip in her hair tightened and with a moan, he released himself in her mouth. Tara swallowed every drop and Lucas pulled her up to him. As he kissed her, he realised that the unfamiliar taste was actually himself.   
He broke the kiss and tightened the embrace. “I could have lost you today.” Tara knew it was true, it could have gone much worse. “But you didn’t. I am still here and I plan to be here for a long, long time, Lucas.”   
He turned the water off, “We should eat; you are going to need all your strength!”   
She grinned and smacked his arse, “Oh, I like the sound of that!” 

While they were eating, Tara noticed redness on Lucas’ right hand. She pointed at it, “What happened?”   
He let out a deep breath, “I am not sure you want to know.”   
Tara nodded, “It has something to do with whatever you needed Dimitri for?”   
He sat down his wine and looked at her, “I beat him up and rather badly so too.”   
Tara rose and went to Lucas and straddled him, holding his head in her hands and resting her forehead on his, “Lucas, you tosser!” She gave him a gentle kiss, “I’m not going to lecture you, I will leave that to Daddy.” He grinned, “He knew all about it.”   
He patted her back, “Enough work talk.”   
Tara nodded, she couldn’t read the expression on his face.   
“What are you up to?”   
He undid her robe and his hand slid up under it, “mmm, that was so much better,” he rumbled as his fingers were playing with her nipples and she moaned and tried to touch him. “Ah, ah,” was his response, “no touching.”   
She felt her robe being pushed off her shoulders. “Lift,” he growled and she felt it being pulled off and thrown on the floor. His hands were now located on her hips, “Are you ok?”   
Tara managed to nod, “Just what are you up to?”   
“You'll see,” there was that wicked smile again as he carried her to the living room and placed her on the sofa. One hand was now between her legs and as he kissed her, two of his fingers suddenly slipped into her. A cry slipped from her and her hips instantly moved. He started moving his fingers very slowly; then faster. He slowed down again and she was moaning "No". He replied, "Want me to stop?" knowing that it was not what she wanted. He moved faster again, she moaned helplessly as he claimed her lips. Her hands immediately buried themselves in his hair as she returned his kisses with as much hunger and eagerness as he was giving her.   
"My God," he breathed; his lips and tongue trailing over the side of her neck and her ear as his fingers stroked and probed her, causing her to grind against him. "You really want this, don't you?"   
"Oh yes, I want it," she moaned, biting her lip as her body trembled and squirmed shamelessly.   
Licking the edge of her ear, he then whispered in his sexiest, most purring tone, "Enough to beg?"   
Barely coherent now, she cried in a voice breaking with need, "Lucas, please..."   
He growled again and gave her another soul-searing kiss as three of his fingers penetrated her again, causing her to moan, and causing a gasp to come from him as he felt her inner muscles clamping tightly over his fingers.   
Slowly he pulled his fingers out and gave her a kiss. He looked down at her, “Straddle me, back against me.”   
Shakingly she did as he asked.   
“Lucas …” She could hardly speak.   
“Shhhhh,” he replied as he nibbled at her neck, “I know you want release and you will have it.”   
With no warning, two fingers penetrated her while his thumb was rubbing her clit.   
There was no way she could control the tension that ripped through her body and he knew it; he could feel it.   
Her eyes were closed and she was moaning as her entire body tightened as the orgasm hit her and then collapsed against him.   
Little by little her breathing became normal and finally she spoke, “Thank you… I needed that.”   
“My pleasure… but you’re not done yet.”   
She watched him dropping the sweatpants, and the sight of him being rock-hard made her gasp in anticipation.   
He moved her to the edge of the sofa, resting on his knees. “Are you comfortable?” he asked.   
Tara nodded and pulled him to her. They began kissing almost violently and as Tara felt him taking his erection in hand and began to teasingly slide it over the soft, wet flesh between her trembling thighs, it caused her to buck her hips toward him with another whimpering moan.   
Unable to stand his teasing, she barely managed to whisper, "Fuck me … please!" The words had barely left her lips before she felt his hands slide to her hips. His eyes bored into hers, there was a beat of stillness and silence broken only by their harsh breathing, and then in the next instant he drove his hips forward, impaling her thoroughly and completely.   
Both of them let out simultaneous groans of pleasure and gripped tightly to each other. She found her body rocked hard against the sofa again and again as he thrust into her, his fingers digging hard into the tender flesh of her thighs and buttocks. His hot breath and occasional soft groans and whispered words of pleasure making her shiver as his lips and tongue worked busily over her heated flesh.   
The angle guaranteed that he reached the very depths of her, filling her totally, and her inner walls were clinging to him, making him a part of her. Her hands slid over the tense, straining muscles of his back and shoulders to tangle in his hair.   
As he repeatedly slammed home deep within her, she felt the familiar tension spreading to her back and leg muscles, making them tighten and tremble. Harsh gasps and loud whimpers burst from her as her hands clawed at his back in her unbearably growing tension.   
"Let go," he murmured in her ear, he pulled back to look into her eyes, still thrusting into her hard, panting with his own extreme lust. His pupils dilated with primal urges beyond his control.   
She kept her gaze locked on him, "Oh god, Lucas!"   
One last thrust made them both come and they collapsed in each other's arms.


	3. Chapter 3

Lucas looked around the table, “I am going away for a couple of days and Adam will be in charge meanwhile.”  
His eyes found Tara’s and Lucas was praying that he wouldn’t have to tell her anything until he was back. She was not going to like it and there was no need to cause pain and worry.  
Everyone was leaving the meeting room, and Lucas asked Tara to stay behind; he wanted to say goodbye in private.  
She slipped into his open arms, “When are you leaving?”  
He embraced her tightly, “As soon as I have said goodbye to you.”  
“Lucas, be careful and come back in one piece.”  
He nodded, “I will.”  
Tara sighed deeply, “Give me a kiss and sod off.”  
Lucas smiled, “I like the idea of the former better than the latter.”  
As they broke the kiss, Tara looked at him, “Remember that I love you, Mr North.”  
“I love you too, Mrs North – and I’ll be home in a few days.”

Tara stood silently watching him leave the conference room, she needed a few minutes to herself before joining the others. Now she knew why Lucas had been in Harry’s office all morning with the door closed and she knew better than to ask where he was going. Lucas would have told her if he could, she would just have to wait until he got home. She went to the windows, just in time to see Lucas cross the yard and drive off in a car belonging to the Grid.  
She closed the blinds and pulled herself together. She went back to her desk; she had work to do.

Lucas rushed through Heathrow after having hidden all personal items and papers in the car and went straight on board his flight. “One of the benefits of being MI-5”, he thought to himself with a smile.  
Once in his seat, his thoughts wandered back to Tara. He knew he would have to face her anger when he returned, and so would Harry but Harry wouldn’t have asked him to go if he could have sent someone else.

Fiddling with where the wedding band had been on his left ring finger, his thoughts went back to their wedding. He looked at his finger and remembered the ring; the inside was engraved “Tara, my yesterday, my today, my tomorrow” and the date. Their colleagues had all been there and Dimitri and Caroline’s twins, Max and Mia, had been ring bearer and flower girl. As Lucas’ father had passed away a couple of years before and they both were technically orphans, he and Tara had decided to walk together up the aisle. He had asked Harry for permission to marry Tara though, an act that had felt right as Harry was close to a father for both of them. With no hesitation, he had given his approval.   
Somehow Lucas suspected that the Grid would see more weddings in the future; everyone at the Grid was living with a colleague. Dimitri and Harry’s daughter, Caroline, had been an item for years and with a grin Lucas recalled how Tara and Caroline had talked Harry into hiring Caroline. Graham, Harry’s son, was living with Layla, a MI6 woman. Tariq had been living with Danni, also a MI6 woman, for quite some time. Harry and Ruth had gotten married, much to Tara’s delight, the year before and Ruth had recommended the place they had spent their honeymoon to Lucas; a wonderful secluded place in the mountains at the Spanish coast.

Lucas settled back in the seat and closed his eyes; soon he would be home with Tara again.

Days passed and Tara was getting worried. No calls from Lucas and she could not get hold of him, his phone was shut off.   
She decided to take the rest of the day off; everything was quiet so it would be alright. 

Halfway home she realised that she had left her phone on her desk. Annoyed with herself, she turned the car. As she pulled in at the parking lot behind the Grid, she noticed the car Lucas had been leaving in was there too.  
She rushed upstairs and impatiently waited for the door to open. Once in, she grabbed her phone. Adam grinned, “Harry’s office” and she headed toward the open door. Ruth came out of the office across Harry’s at the same time and just nodded at Tara.   
Standing in the doorway, she heard one word, “Russia” and her blood froze. Just then Harry looked past Lucas, “Hello sweetheart!”  
With more calmness than she felt, she went inside and took a good look at Lucas, “You were in Russia?”  
He nodded, “I was.” His instincts told him to not even think about trying to get too close to her; she was furious.  
Harry knew that look very well, “Tara, he went because I gave him an order.”  
She completely ignored Harry, “Russia as in the country that held you prisoner for 8 years?”  
Lucas looked into her eyes, “Yes.”  
Tara nodded, “Interesting. And what brilliant excuse do the two of you have for not telling me the truth? Because you did obviously consider that something could have gone very wrong, right?”  
Harry shook his head, “Tara, you are my daughter, I would have turned Russia upside down to get Lucas back to you.”  
Tara stared at him, “Yeah? It took you 8 years the last time to get him out and you know as well as I do that they wouldn’t let him go once more.”  
Harry reached out, “I am so very sorry, sweetheart, we should have told you the truth but we didn’t want to worry you. It was never mine or Lucas’ intention to hurt you.”  
Tara looked at him, “Nonetheless you both did. And not wanting to worry me is not a valid excuse. You kept the truth from me because you both knew I would raise hell had I known.“  
She walked towards the door, “You two really should be ashamed of yourselves”.  
Ruth patted her arm, Tara knew she understood and whispered a silent “Thank you”.  
She didn’t hear Harry turn to Ruth for help.  
Ruth looked through the blinds, “What did you expect, Harry? You sent the man she loves back to Russia. She knows better than anyone of us what they did to him the last time.”  
Ruth turned to Harry and Lucas, “The two most important men in her life, her father and her husband, should have known better than keeping the truth from her. You both have a lot of making up to do.”

Tara went back to her desk and Adam looked up, “Everything alright?”  
Tara shook her head, “I have to get out of here.”  
She grabbed her things and Adam joined her, “Let’s go for a little walk, you are not capable of driving right now.”  
They crossed the road and went to sit on a bench, overlooking River Thames.   
Adam took a good look at her, “I don’t know what has happened but you need rest, and the Grid needs you being your normal happy self.”  
Tara studied Adam’s face, “Adam, please … Don’t tell me you knew too?”  
“Knew what?” Adam said with a puzzled look on his face, “Lucas walked in the door 5 minutes after you left and went straight to Harry’s office.”  
He nodded toward the Grid, “Want to go work out a bit before I send you home to bed?”  
Tara looked at him and nodded, “Yeah, I think that will be a good idea!”  
As they crossed the road, Tara placed a hand on his arm, “Adam?”  
He turned his head, “What?”  
“Thank you for being my friend and for always being there when I need it.”  
He shook his head, “Always, you know that.”  
She just nodded, she knew.

Tara and Adam split outside the gym, “See you in 5,” Adam said with a grin, “Be prepared to get your arse kicked!”  
Tara laughed, “We’ll see about that!”

A couple of minutes later they met inside the gym as they had done so many times before. Years ago Adam had taught her kick boxing and they had spent hours and hours training.  
About half an hour later Tara signalled that she had had enough. Adam just grinned, “Oh no, it ain’t over yet. I told you I would kick your arse!”  
“Over my dead body,” Tara replied just as Lucas silently entered the gym and she managed to deliver a proper kick, knocking the air out of Adam. For a second Tara looked worried – until Adam looked up at her, “I’m going to get you for that one!”  
Tara grinned, “Not today you won’t! You need to catch your breath first!”  
“Touché!” Adam laughed and looked past her, “Hey Lucas!” He turned his attention to Tara, “I’m hitting the shower.”  
They finished the training with the traditional greeting and Adam left.  
Tara grabbed the towel and dried her face, “What are you doing here? You should be up there planning more little field trips to Russia or some other godforsaken outback.”  
Lucas was about to speak but Tara interrupted him, “And don’t even think about telling me you are sorry.”  
“Could you try to be reasonable?” Lucas asked her.  
Something snapped inside her, anger flared through her and the next thing she knew they were arguing rather loudly. After a while, she shrugged at him, “I’m out of here. I’m sure you can find your own way home, you managed to get here from Russia after all.”  
And with that, she just walked out.

As Lucas was driving toward the house, he was praying that Tara had calmed down a bit while driving; London at that time of day was not the right place for rabid driving.   
He got stuck in a minor traffic jam and his own anger was calmed a bit. He was, however, angry with himself for not telling Tara where he was going, angry for hurting her – and angry with her for not listening and for risking an accident when driving in that state – even if he had to admit that she was a good driver. Her exit from the gym wasn’t really helping either. She knew it made him even angrier when she walked out during an argument, regardless of her reasons.

Lucas pressed the remote and the garage door opened; her car was there. He parked next to it and closed the garage door again.  
In the hallway he stood silently for a moment; her jacket and keys were on the floor, her shoes had been kicked off and left where they had fallen. It was not like her to leave things like that and he quietly put everything in their respective place along with his own stuff.  
The noise of the oven being slammed shut and then her angry steps coming toward the hallway made his anger return and as she entered the hallway, he grabbed her arm.  
“You walked away from me,” he stated with a low, dark voice.  
She nodded, her eyes glowing with anger, “I did. Let me go.”  
She wiggled and he just held on tighter, “That’s not doing any good. I’m not letting you go until I decide you can.”  
Calmly she stared at him, “Let me go.”   
He ignored her, “What were you going to say when you walked out?”  
She sighed, “Let me go, this is not getting you anywhere except you pissing me off.”  
“Now, that’s not the right way to welcome your husband home, is it?” His face came closer to hers.  
He could tell by the look on her face that something snapped inside her and the vein on her neck told him she was about to explode with anger.  
Her nails dug into his hand to free her from his grip, “You could have gotten killed or been imprisoned,” she clawed at his hand, “and that would have left me not knowing what had happened to you.”  
He kept the tight grip on her arm, “But nothing happened and I am here.”  
“UUUGH! Let me GO!”  
In one swift move, he had her against the wall, “Oh I have a much better idea!”  
Tara struggled to get free when she realised he was unbuttoning his jeans, “What the hell, Lucas?! You think a shag will change anything?!”  
Kicking his jeans and boxers aside he had the sense to block her body; he had seen and felt during training that she could kick some serious arse. Staring into her eyes, he stated, “Shut up and kiss me.”  
Tara turned her head to the side and he had had it. “Stop fighting me.” Letting go of her hands, he yanked her skirt down along with her knickers and took hold of her shirt. “Now, we can do this the nice way or the rough way. Either you remove that shirt or I will but it won’t be in one piece then. Your choice.”  
The tone of his voice made Tara insist on removing the shirt herself; he was too angry to reason with.   
Her shirt dropped to the floor and the look on his face changed slightly, “Good girl. Keep being obedient.”   
He moved closer, pressing his body against hers, his hand slid between her legs. “Spread them,” he growled and she obeyed.  
Two fingers slipped inside her and to Lucas’ pleasure, she was wet already. “Oh, you want this as bad I do, don’t you?” Not waiting for her reply, “And now, my darling, I am going to fuck you into oblivion.”  
He was already hard as a rock and with ease he lifted her up and let her slide down his body, impaling her in one go.  
There was no time to adjust and Tara held on to his back and the other hand was grasping at his hair. Every time Lucas thrust into her, her back was being rubbed against the wall and in response, her nails dug into his back, causing him to hiss. This wasn’t about romance or foreplay; this was pure and raw fucking and it didn’t take long before she could feel the familiar burn in her lower belly. All her muscles tightened and she was clinging to him, Lucas could feel her pussy clenching around his cock and with a low thump, her head hit the wall as she came hard. Lucas stopped and let her feet reach the floor; he was nowhere near done.  
“I didn’t give you permission to come,” he growled and continued, “Turn around, hands on the wall.”   
On unsteady legs, she did what she was told and he started pounding into her, leaving her moaning. She soon lost control over her breathing again and her legs started to shake.  
His skilful fingers found her clit and started rubbing it. He could feel his own orgasm approach and Tara was almost there too, by now she had lost all control over mind and body. Groaning and moaning were heard as he slammed into her one last time, releasing himself inside her.  
He had the sense to hold her and once he regained enough control, he pulled out and gently helped her sit on the floor. He sat down with his back against the wall and Tara resting in his arms.  
For some time they didn’t speak, they just sat there in silence, Lucas caressing her back and Tara finding comfort in listening to his heartbeat.  
Finally Lucas broke the silence, “Are you OK?”  
Tara looked up at him, “Yes, I am. Good lord, Lucas, I don’t know what I would have done if something had gone wrong.”  
He brushed away some straws of hair from her face, “But nothing did. I am right here and I am not doing something like that again.” He smiled for the first time, “Harry wouldn’t even think about asking again. I think it scared him to see you that angry.”  
Tara got on her feet, “It should. He still owes me some answers though.”  
Lucas got up too, “Enough work talk! I want my welcome home kiss!”  
Tara wrapped her arms around him, “And what’s in it for me?”  
“You get to kiss your husband; that should be enough, woman!”  
Tara shook her head with a cheeky smile, “If you promise me another round later, we can talk about it.”  
Lucas never replied, he simply tilted her head back a little and claimed her lips.


	4. Chapter 4

Tara stretched and sat up in bed just as Lucas came into the bedroom.  
He bent down and gave her a kiss, resting on his hands, “Good morning, sunshine, how are you feeling?”  
She let out a low sound, “I am rather sore, to be honest – but it was well worth it!”   
With a rather pleased grin he said, “Harry and Ruth are coming over to have breakfast with us, I am making it right now.”  
She got out of bed, “What? I don’t recall anything about that?”  
He shook his head, “No, Ruth called earlier and I asked them over.”  
He gave her arse a solid smack, “So you better hit the shower while I finish.”  
Tara turned as she reached the bathroom door, “We were at it like rabbits yesterday, and you are not even the slightest worn out!”  
Lucas shrugged with a grin and went to the kitchen.

Tara looked at the table, “Are you going to feed an army?”  
“No,” Lucas replied, “But Conny and Malcolm are popping by too.”  
“Oh?” Tara looked confused, “I thought they were in France enjoying their retirement.”  
“Mmmm,” Lucas murmured and handed Tara a mug with coffee, “Conny wanted to come home for the twins’ birthday.”  
He pointed at a bottle of oil, “What is that for?”  
Tara grinned, “That you will have to put on my back, my spine is covered in little scratches.”  
Lucas lifted the back of her shirt up, “Ouch! I’m so sorry! I didn’t think about the wall being rough.”  
He finished and put the bottle on the kitchen counter, “There,” he said with a huge smile on his face as he adjusted her shirt, “I’ll put more on later, yes?”  
Tara turned around, “Indeed you will!” She began to laugh, “Wipe that grin off your face!”  
Lucas embraced her, “Promise me that you won’t be too hard on Harry.”  
Tara sighed, “I know he did what he had to – and you too for that matter – and I understand that part of it. But keeping me in the dark … the two of you treated me like I was a fragile and helpless little girl, and you should know that I am not.”  
Lucas smiled, “Oh I know you are not! And in hindsight I agree, we should have told you.”  
He leaned down and kissed her, “I almost regret having company!”  
She laughed, “You just want another roll in the hay!”   
“Um… technically I think that would be “in the hall”, yes?” Lucas grinned.  
The sound of closing car doors made them realise that their guests had arrived.

Shortly after, Harry, Ruth, Connie and Malcolm entered the kitchen. Harry stayed in the background, watching Tara greet the others.   
Lucas came over to him, “You look like you are about to be thrown to the lions!”  
Harry nodded, “Ruth has been bugging me all night and this morning.” He looked down, then at Lucas, “It was wrong of us.”  
Lucas looked at Tara, “I know, Harry. I have already told her that but I think she needs to hear it from you too.”  
Harry sighed deeply, “OK then, if I am not back here in 15 minutes, send in the cavalry!”  
Just then Tara came over, “Hi daddy. You look tired.”  
Harry took her by the elbow, “I am, Ruth has been rather upset with me because of … it. You and I need to talk.”  
“Right,” Lucas exclaimed, “I have to finish the scrambled eggs!”  
Tara looked at Harry, “Yes, we do. We can go into the study.”

Tara closed the door behind them, “Sit down, please.”  
Harry sat down in silence and watched his daughter pace back and forth, she was showing no sign of anger.  
Finally she spoke, “I understand you had to send Lucas, I understand that he could get the job done. I just don’t understand how you thought it was OK to keep the truth from me. You treated me like a little girl.”  
She sat down on the edge of the desk, “Daddy, if something had gone wrong, I wouldn’t have had the chance to say goodbye to him, I wouldn’t have had the chance to tell him I love him.”  
There was a look of pain on her face, “Life without Lucas isn’t life, daddy.”  
Harry didn’t speak, he just got up and wrapped his arms around Tara. He suddenly remembered the moment when they learned that her parents were gone and he had to break her young heart by telling her.  
He finally spoke, very softly, “We were wrong and I am so very sorry, sweetheart, I hope you can forgive me one day. You know I never meant to hurt you, don’t you?”  
Tara nodded, “I know and I have forgiven you for sending him off simply because he came back.”  
Harry let go of her and fiddled with a lock of her hair, “You will always be my little girl, no matter how old you are. But I will do my best not to treat you like a child again. And I will never keep the truth from you again; it was wrong of me.”  
Tara looked at Harry, she knew this was as much as she would get. Simply because he was a man of few words when it came to emotions. She smiled, “Come on, let’s go have breakfast. My poor husband has been slaving in the kitchen all morning!”  
As they returned to the kitchen, Lucas asked her, “Everything ok?”  
She nodded and gave him a kiss, “Everything is fine.”  
They went to the table and sat down to have breakfast with their guests.

Shortly after Adam could be heard in the hallway, “Pregnant woman coming through!” and Ros responding, “Stop it!”  
Lucas went to get a chair for Ros, while Tara got mugs and plates and Adam got water for Ros.  
Ros was due in a couple of weeks and Tara suspected that was the main reason Malcolm and Connie had returned from France. Surely Malcolm would want to be around, as did Connie, when the first grandchild was born. Adam was the result of a short but intense affair between Malcolm and Adam’s mother.

Adam looked rather pleased when he announced that the nursery was all done and ready for the little one.  
Tara looked at him, “Did you paint a family tree?”  
“No?” Adam looked puzzled and Ros began to laugh, “We will need that to explain the numbers of aunts and uncles and how it is that everyone at work is somehow related!”  
Adam grinned, “Luckily we won’t have to come up with that explanation for at least 5 years.”

Breakfast was over a long time ago and they were all still sitting and chatting. Tara turned to Lucas, “Why aren’t the others here too?”  
Lucas smiled, “Danni, Graham and Layla are working, Ben and Jo is out picking up the gifts for the twins and the baby, Caroline and Dimitri are at his parents. Tariq didn’t answer his phone.”  
He grinned as he continued, “But no worries, they will all be here for dinner!”  
She looked at Lucas, “Thank you.”  
He looked puzzled, “For what?”  
“For being you, for making me happy, for … everything.”  
He cupped her face and kissed her without saying a word which caused Adam to exclaim, “Uh the Norths are at it!”  
Tara laughed, “We are not!”  
“No,” Lucas said, “The only thing we are going to be at with you in the house, is to go shopping for dinner.” He threw the car keys to Adam, “You’re driving!”  
He turned to Tara with a grin, “Brace yourself, he’ll be around all day!”  
She rolled her eyes, “Oh good lord!” and then laughed, “Have fun shopping!”

Tara began clearing the table, while Ruth and Connie filled the dishwasher and cleaned up.  
Ros looked tired and Tara got worried, “Are you OK?”  
Ros nodded, “Yes, I am just so tired at the moment.”  
“Go lie down, the guest room is all yours,” Tara smiled, “If you need anything, just holler.”  
Ros trotted off with a grateful look on her face and the others sat down at the table again, ready to hear all about life in France.

As they were driving, Adam asked, “So what was going on yesterday?”  
Lucas glanced at Adam, “Harry and I fucked up.”  
Adam nodded, “Um yeah, I figured that much. I was the one that took the beating, remember?!”  
Lucas told him what had happened and Adam listened in silence. As he parked the car, he told Lucas, “At least you two do it properly when you fuck things up!”  
Lucas nodded in agreement, sadly Adam was absolutely right.


	5. Chapter 5

Lucas was looking out the window as Tara drove off to pick up Caroline and Mia. He saw a woman standing across the street, she too was watching as Tara drove off. It wasn’t the first time he had seen her there and Lucas grabbed his camera and started taking pictures of the woman. He wasn’t sure what it was about her, but she did look slightly familiar.

At the Grid, Lucas transferred the pictures from the camera to his computer and started looking at the photos.   
“Harry,” Lucas said as Harry was walking by, “I need your help.”  
Harry turned to Lucas, “of course. How can I help?”  
Lucas pointed at his screen, “I’ve seen a woman several times on our street and she is always watching Tara leaving.”  
Harry frowned, “Any contact made?”  
“No,” Lucas replied, “she is just standing there. This morning I took some pictures of her and I…”  
Harry interrupted, he had a bad feeling about this, “Show me!”  
Lucas moved so Harry could see the screen and Lucas noticed Harry turned slightly pale.  
“Are you OK?”, he asked Harry.  
“That,” Harry said, “is Tara’s mother.”

Lucas stared at Harry, “How is that possible?! Hannah died years ago.”  
Harry sat down on the edge of the desk and sighed, “That is the official story. Good grief, Lucas!”  
Harry ran a hand through his hair, “Hannah was a double agent and had to choose side. She chose the Russians and I refused to let Tara go, so she had to leave her here with me.”  
He glanced at Lucas, “And before you ask; yes, I am Tara’s father, not her uncle.”

Lucas’ brain was spinning; he could only imagine how Tara would react when she found out.  
Harry continued, “The uncle part was to protect Tara. She was only 2 when Hannah and I split and nobody outside the family knew we had a child. As my sister passed away in an accident at the same time, it was easy claiming Tara was her child to the outsiders.”  
“But Tara’s birth certificate,” Lucas began.  
Harry shook his head, “The original is in the safe in my office.”  
Harry and Lucas looked at each other, almost as looking for support. They both knew it would be hard telling Tara the truth.

Tara went to the baby department while Caroline and Mia were in the toy department. She quickly found what she was looking for and went to pay. She noticed a woman watching her; it wasn’t the first time she had seen her but up until now she had always thought of it as coincidence. Tara was no longer sure about that; it was too often and in unexpected places, the woman showed up. Without thinking, she grabbed her phone and called Lucas. She quickly explained what she felt and answered Lucas’ question about where she was. Lucas told her to go find Caroline and stay near her. Tara smiled, “Yes, Lucas, I am on my way now.”  
She went to the toy store and found Caroline and Mia and thought nothing more about the woman.

Tara was cooking dinner when Harry and Ruth arrived. She could tell something was up; he looked very troubled.  
Tara looked at Ruth but she made an “I have no idea” gesture. Tara turned her attention to Harry, “Do you want a cup of coffee?”  
Harry sent her a weak smile, “I could use something stronger.”  
Tara called for Lucas and asked him to get Harry a whisky. As Lucas sat the whisky in front of Harry it struck her that he didn’t seem surprised. She couldn’t help wondering what they had been up to – and from the look on Ruth’s face, she was wondering too.  
Lucas told Tara to sit down, and then he asked Ruth to join him for finishing the meal.

Tara looked puzzled, “Daddy, what is going on?!”  
Harry sighed, “I have something to tell you.”  
She nodded, “I have kind of figured that out. Are you ill? Is Ruth ill?”  
Harry shook his head, “No, it is nothing like that.”  
“Ah, then it can’t be that bad!”  
Harry took a deep breath, “Just let me talk. When I am done, you can ask all the questions you want, OK?”  
She nodded and sat quietly, preparing herself for something she had no idea what was.

Harry swallowed hard, “There is no easy way to do this, so here goes.”  
Tara watched as he laid a birth certificate on the table and some pictures. She became nauseous when she recognised the woman that had been watching her.  
“It’s your mother.”  
She didn’t say anything but silently listened to Harry explaining what he had explained to Lucas earlier.   
When Harry had finished talking, he took a large sip of his drink.  
To his surprise, Tara was smiling, “Well, I had figured out you are my father but her… A part of me is happy that she is not dead and a part of me is appalled by the fact that she left her child behind. Is that normal?”  
Ruth and Lucas had joined them and Ruth touched Tara’s arm, “Yes, that is perfectly normal feeling that way. Are you ok?”  
Tara nodded, “Yes, I think I am. I am not really sure what I feel.”  
Harry looked relieved, he had feared tears or anger; things he was not good at handling when it came to Tara.  
Tara hugged Harry, “Thank you for not letting her take me to Russia and thank you for being my daddy.”  
Harry brushed her hair back, “It is an honour being your daddy.”  
She sat down again, “But how did you know she is back, and why is she coming back now?”  
Harry decided to be honest, “I don’t know why she is back. It was Lucas that took some pictures of her and he showed me.”  
Tara was thinking hard and it was as if Harry could read her thoughts, “Tara, nobody is expecting you to meet her with open arms. And you cannot be blamed if you choose not to have anything to do with her.”  
Lucas sat a glass of wine in front of Tara, “You look like you need it.”  
“But isn’t it risky for her to come back?” Tara focused on Harry.  
“No,” Harry replied, “what she was involved in died years ago.”  
“Hmmm,” Tara replied, “at least she wasn’t in a hurry to see me then.”  
Harry didn’t answer, Hannah had never been a woman that would do the expected.

Days passed with no sight of Hannah and Tara had almost begun thinking that she had gone back to Russia.  
One day she was sitting at the café during lunch when Hannah showed up. She pointed at the empty chair across Tara, “Is this seat taken?”  
Tara looked at her, “No, it is not.”  
Hannah didn’t waste any time, “Do you know who I am?”  
Tara nodded, “Yes, you are the woman who gave birth to me and then decided you wanted to live in Russia.”  
“What did Harry tell you?”  
“You tell me your version. At this point in time, it is none of your business what Harry did or did not tell me.”  
Hannah began speaking and her version was the same as Harry’s, except she had some extra information for Tara, “You have a younger brother, Thomas.”  
“Oh,” Tara pursed her lips, “and where did you leave him?”  
“Thomas is here in the UK; he is living in Brighton, he’s a doctor. He moved here to go to university and has been here ever since.”  
She continued, “I never stopped thinking about you.”  
Tara waved her hand, “I really don’t need that. You made a choice and you have to live with the consequences.”  
Hannah swallowed hard, “I know I can’t just come back and be a part of your life…” She paused and placed a photo in front of Tara. “This is Thomas.” Tara looked at the photo and then back at Hannah. “Does Harry know that you raised his son in Russia?”  
Hannah began saying something but was interrupted by Tara, “Don’t even try to lie. Thomas is the spitting image of Harry when he was young. And regardless of what you might think, I am not easily fooled.”  
Hannah looked at the photo, “Thomas is the result of Harry and I saying goodbye. Sergei accepted him as his.”  
Tara shook her head, “Good Lord. What kind of a woman are you?! You leave your child to go to Russia of all places, you bang your ex despite being in a relationship and you are spying on your own country. I have to say I find your moral rather questionable, to say the least! Did Sergei even know the truth about Thomas?”  
Hannah looked sad, “Tara, I was very young. I don’t regret having you or Thomas but I regret being a double agent.”  
She looked at the clock, “I have to go, maybe we’ll meet again. I just wanted to see that you were happy.” She noticed Tara was holding the picture of Thomas, “Keep the picture, his phone number is on the back if you want to call him. He does know about you.”  
Tara said nothing, she just sat there watching Hannah as she left the café. She wasn’t sure what she felt but she did know she would have to talk to Harry.

Tara returned to the Grid and immediately went to see Harry.  
Harry could tell she was upset and waved at her. Tara sank down in a chair. “Hannah came to the café today and … “ She stared at Harry, “I am so sorry to say this but you have a son.” She handed Harry the photo. “Daddy, I really don’t know what I think of her. She betrayed her country, her boyfriend, her ex, her children.” She shook her head, “I guess that is what she is best at.”  
Harry said nothing, he understood this was something Tara had to work out for herself. He had decided a long time ago that he would keep his feelings about Hannah to himself.  
Harry looked at the picture, there was no doubt it was his son but right now his oldest daughter was his priority. He couldn’t do much but he could support her.

Tara sat down at her desk and looked around, “Where is Adam?”  
Jo smiled, “At the hospital. It looks like the baby is going to arrive today!”  
“Getting broody?” Lucas asked with a grin. There was a big smile on Tara’s face as she checked the bag with gifts for the little one. They were all dying to know if it was a boy or a girl; not even Ros or Adam knew. They wanted it to be a surprise.

Hours later Adam finally called Harry to tell him that Ros and he were now parents to a baby boy. They had named him Aron and mother and child were doing fine. As agreed, Malcolm and Ruth stopped by the Grid to pick up gifts for Aron and Tara couldn’t help smiling at the proud look on Malcolm’s face, he was beaming.  
It really suited sweet uncle Malcolm to be a grandfather and Tara liked the thought of a new member of the "family".


End file.
